The key to being fired is not terrible. The key is to learn from it.
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Editor’s note: People in the workplace, whether objective or subjective, may end up being dismissed. After unemployment, some people choose to fall, some choose to be discouraged, others choose to be strong, and choose to make a comeback. The original title of this article is Dealing With Being Fired, author Tim Denning, through his own dismissal experience, shares with you a series of psychological changes after his dismissal and his views and responses to his dismissal. I hope that I have Inspired.
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I used to be a person who was dismissed by the company. Before that, I have never been similar. After being fired, no one directed me and told me what to do next.
So, I hope that through this article, I will share the lessons I have learned in the fired squid and hope that it will be useful to you.
At three o’clock that afternoon, I was preparing to attend the last meeting of the day. Before that, I just ended my one-on-one conversation with members of the team. However, the strange thing is that during the communication, he mentioned my job before the job. He wants to know why I left the company before and why I have to make a career change.
In about an hour of talking with him, I was basically talking nonstop. But at the end of the day, I said that sentence, he seems to understand very well. I told him that the reason I resigned was because all the members of the team had left before, leaving me alone. I also want to know what it would be like to work in another environment and become friends with new colleagues. In the end, I don’t know what it means to communicate with him, but what happened next is unexpected.
After communicating with my colleagues, I went straight to the next meeting room. I was standing outside the conference with the heads of other departments, and the atmosphere at the time was a bit strange. My boss suddenly came over from the right side and said to me, “Do you have time?” How can I answer his question? Can you say no time?
“Of course, I havetime. Do you want to call the team owners to have a meeting? ”
“No, you can do it.”
I walked with him to the other side of the office. In the process, there is no ordinary joke, no loose body language, and nothing like the usual Friday afternoon.
I still remember the last Friday afternoon when I and the entire team members celebrated in a club. It has always been Friday afternoon to celebrate the performance of the week.
Afterwards, my boss and I entered another meeting room. The conference room is small in size, the room space is low, and the room lighting is still fluorescent. It gives the impression that it is like the courtroom in the police station.
The boss then handed me an unopened white envelope. At the time, I didn’t think it was good news. When I opened the envelope, the truth was also true. It was a letter of resignation, and the reason for the dismissal was ridiculous.
Maybe, my boss may realize that I don’t really appreciate his leadership style. Perhaps, he may have seen the article about leadership that I secretly wrote, and many of the arguments in the article are based on him. But I don’t think these are the reasons for dismissing me.
The boss is older, with black eyes and gray hair, and laughs with a feeling of incompetence. However, his suit that he wears every day is pretty good, with a clear selection of colors and a variety of styles.
He is the kind of boss you might not want to touch for a lifetime. In his eyes, subordinates should be dismissed on a regular basis (like the end of my end), sorrowful, subordinate shameless, and all people are afraid of his shock, while guaranteeing everyone All are loyal to him.
Although he wants everyone to be loyal to him, but because of his way of life, few people actually take him seriously. From my descriptions and opinions about him, you may feel that he is like the enemy of the entire company or the problem.
Although these comments are somewhat reasonable, in the past few years, I have realized that being angry with these people does not actually give me any gains. It may be more meaningful to find out the reasons behind their behavior than before. In addition, I also realized that no matter how annoying a person is, everyone can make changes in nature. Everyone deserves a second chance.
In your life, forgiving those who blame you or abuse you may be one of the hardest things.
In the face of such annoying boss, you can still forgive him, then you can do a lot of things. I have not yet reached that realm, but I hope that I can fight in this direction.
After the boss told me about the dismissal, I can clearly feel the emotion in his voice. His entire body was slightly shaken and he felt a little uneasy.
A few months have passedLater, I learned that in his career, he has resigned several hundred people. Although it sounds a bit strange, in his career, layoffs are his most eye-catching “performance.” You can even say that he is familiar with the layoffs. But this time, he lost his hand.
This time, it is different from the past. When I noticed his emotions, I actually wanted to express my emotions. I actually wanted to confront him in person and questioned why he was different from the past. However, at the time, because I was sorting out my emotions and thoughts, there was no other move. In these cases, it seems like a hero is a very simple thing, but you still fall into these dilemmas, and still do not know how to go out. Sometimes, accepting and calming is often your best friend.
If I really want to say that I won at that moment, it is that I have stopped the idea of revenge in my heart, did not publish any nasty comments, and did not show a trace of disrespect, but chose to be friendly. The room left the meeting room. Even if you are dismissed, you should show your respect when you leave. This is the right approach.
After knowing that I was dismissed, I also received the “last threat.” In fact, I have different views on this “threat” and I also want to question my boss in person. But this “threat” made my brain run fast. It was more like a bayonet, piercing my back. It is obviously a lie, and I know that it is a lie, but I still doubt myself. That “threat” made me question my ability and I had to choose to accept this fact.
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About feedback
Although I was eager to escape from the office as soon as possible, I still would not do so without any substantial feedback. There are always some experiences and lessons in this matter.
And I did get a helpful suggestion. The boss told me that when I was assigning tasks to the team, I should be more clear about what they were going to do and how to be successful. In fact, I have thought about this before myself. When the boss proposed this, it also verified my hypothesis, which is a reward for me.
So, if you don’t gain any experience or lessons from being dismissed, then the squid may not be meaningful.
No matter how good you are, you will always be at somewhereThere are shortcomings in the aspect, and everyone is not perfect. This is a fact that is understandable. Admit your imperfections, accept other people’s suggestions and feedback, you can better help you grow, and also help the next job. We could have blamed all the blame on the company or the boss, but this can only fool yourself, and you should be aware of it yourself. In these difficult times, we should all shoulder certain responsibilities and recognize our own shortcomings.
About shame
This is not the hardest part. Once I knew my “destiny”, I was thinking about how to leave the company. No matter how confident you are, being dismissed by the company can be extremely embarrassing, shameful and even sad. And if the whole process has witnessed by other colleagues, it may be more difficult to digest and accept.
As for how I left the company, I have the same opinion as my boss. I have to delete the personal files on the company’s computer, collect the personal items, and then he will “send” me away. I went to my desk, unlocked the computer, and then started browsing and deleting personal files. The female colleague across the seat did not know the scene that happened quietly. She seemed to be telling me something, but my attention was not at all what she said.
All I want is to leave as soon as possible and then go home. When you have too many thoughts in your mind, it is not an easy task to pack your belongings. Therefore, I have accepted the fact that if I miss something, it is no big deal.
About personal dignity
At the last moments of dismissal, somehow, my mind was thinking about the picture of self-dignity. At that time, there was an umbrella next to the company a few weeks ago, and I liked the umbrella very much. But I realized that it was not an important thing, so I decided to abandon it. Not letting go of any item will only make you lose more, and I naturally don’t want to pay for it.
In a panic, I packed my personal belongings and stuffed them into my briefcase. Then I indicated to my boss that I was ready to leave. And his cooperation, at least did not let others know that I left.
It took an hour to get off the elevator. I stood side by side with him in the ladder, and there was no communication between the two sides. During the downhill process of the elevator, it continued to stay on each floor, but there was no one after opening the elevator door. This can really be said to be “God assists.”
Finally, the elevator finally reached the first floor. I handed the access card to the boss and wished him a happy layoff in the next round, then turned and left.
When I got out of the office building, I also saw two team members across the road. They waved to me and let me join. But I face them without a face. So he waved his hand and continued to move forward.
When I went to the shopping center, I called my girlfriend.. At a similar moment after being with her, she always knew how to comfort me. She told me that it is best to give up those thoughts about “threats” and look ahead. There will definitely be no such inferior boss in the future. After hearing these comforting words, I feel much better myself.
In the process of talking to my girlfriend, I suddenly remembered that my insulated lunch box was still in the pantry of the pantry. I didn’t eat lunch at noon that day. In addition, I found that there are still expenses that have not been reimbursed. So, I thought about whether to call the boss and ask if he can help me bring the lunch box bag down, and help me solve the cost reimbursement problem.
However, I recalled my own dignity. Especially in the case of being dismissed, it is not worthwhile if you go back to the company or dispute for reimbursing this little thing. In fact, I can say goodbye to my boss, which is even a reward.
About sleepless nights
After I got home, I didn’t want to do anything. What is happening in my mind is all kinds of disappointment, fear and anger. But the undoubted fact that I am facing is that I am unemployed and have no income to pay the rent. But I looked at my girlfriend and realized that taking care of her is one of the things I care the most about. The shame of being dismissed is really hard to let people feel.
That night, I went to bed very early. I thought it might be better to take a nap. But in fact, I can’t sleep. All night, my mind emerged as a former boss, the angry consumers who were disappointed by the company, and my team would think about my departure. Are they sad? Will they not agree? Or do they care? These problems have made me unable to fall asleep.
About doing nothing
The next morning, I was a groggy look. My thoughts and body had a fierce confrontation last night, but I did not decide the outcome. It was just Saturday, and I was doing nothing during the morning, and the environment around me was surprisingly quiet. I didn’t even feel anything, completely numb in the pain of unemployment.
I think fitness should be a good way, so I went to the gym. When I was immersed in various exercises, I realized that fitness was already one of the habits that I could not do without. At this time, when I think about the things that have been dismissed, I really feel fearless. From the sudden heartbeat of the previous day to the fearlessness of the next day, perhaps this is the real role of our own survival instinct, let us recover from the various attacks and setbacks we have experienced as soon as possible.
About people who care about you
Of course, being dismissed may also make you feel lonely. So, when I logged into various social platforms to check the information, I found that there was some friendly information and I felt very warm. Among them, there are team members who have led themselves. They thanked me for the motivation and teaching I used to. Despite all kinds of unpleasant emotions beforeThese feedbacks may be considered the best gifts after being dismissed. Knowing what you have done, at least for some people, is valuable and can be said to be the best experience for the individual.
Even if you are in private, someone always remembers you and cares about you. I am telling the truth, no one may want to see someone being dismissed. People are really concerned about your experience, but their silence is also a kind of respect. Their usual silence is to hope that you have enough personal space. So, before loneliness erodes you, be sure to wake up and be aware of this problem.
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written at the end…
Through this village, there is the next store. In fact, even in the face of the fact of being dismissed, there are still plenty of opportunities to wait for you in the future. If you don’t get what you want, it is the way to life. In turn, it will not only give you motivation, predecessors and lessons, but will also give you the confidence and energy to make a comeback.
In life, like the failure experience of being dismissed, maybe we will experience a lot. The only consolation is that you must realize that these experiences will better point you in the direction.
Before that, the hardest decision I made was to give up the business I founded with my brother. At that moment, the feeling of being dismissed from the manager’s position is similar. It also takes time to recover, but without that experience, I am afraid it is difficult to make progress in personal growth, find a job in the financial industry, experience the experience of being dismissed, or even write this article.
So, to some extent, being dismissed is a good opportunity to prepare for tomorrow’s good, and this is even more special.
If you have experienced the experience of being dismissed before, then I hereby show respect to you. But no matter what your experience, you can always learn useful lessons.
It’s not terrible to meet a bad boss. Of course, there is no need for him to decide your future. Believe in yourself, you are the most special.
Translator: Ishii Junichi