This article is from WeChat official account:NetEase Digital Reading (ID: datablog163) , author: Yan Yu, design: Li Xuting, Nan Yang, head of FIG. source: “thirty andAlready”
The TV series “Thirty Only” is over. The crusade against derailment is not over yet. Even if you open any social platform, you can always scold “Scumbag” Xu Huanshan and “Green Tea” Lin Youyou’s passion Speak.
The last time that netizens across the country could stand on the same front and scold the “scumbag” was Hong Shixian in “The Temptation of Going Home”.
Unexpectedly, this TV series explores the marriage, family, career and other difficulties faced by contemporary Chinese women in their thirties. The most popular topic is the topic of derailment and junior high.
Marital infidelity caused by the intervention of a third party can always arouse the indignation of bystanders. So, in reality, what is the probability of “infidelity” in Chinese marriages? Are men more likely to cheat than women? In marriage, why is there always someone unable to resist the temptation?
The cheating rate is rising, men are more likely to cheat than women
Has more and more Chinese derailed? The answer is indeed this.
Professor Pan Suiming from the Institute of Sexual Sociology, Renmin University of China, conducted a national sample survey on “Chinese Sexuality” from 2000 to 2015. He studied the affair behavior of Chinese people and got some interesting results.
In the past 15 years, Chinese derailment has become more common.
In 2000, the average Chinese cheating rate was only 8%, and 8 out of every 100 people had cheated. By 2015, about one out of every 4 Chinese had cheated. The cheating rate was compared to 2000 An increase of 203.8%.
Same as most people’s impression, in a relationship, the proportion of “scumbags” is indeed higher than that of “scumbags.”
The cheating rate of Chinese men is higher than that of Chinese women. From 2000 to 2015, the average cheating rate of Chinese men was 20.3%, while the average cheating rate of Chinese women was less than half that of men, at 7.9%.
However, in recent years, the proportion of women cheating has increased rapidly, and the rate of cheating has increased slightly higher than that of men.
In 2015, the Chinese male cheating rate was 34%, an increase of 188.9% from 11.8% in 2000. In 2015, the female cheating rate in China was 13.4%, an increase of 226.8% from 4.1% in 2000.
However, even if the overall increase in women is higher, the gap between male and female derailment rates has not narrowed, but has gradually widened.
In a relationship, both parties are cheating, and there are also situations where “everyone plays their own”, and the proportion is increasing. In 2015, every 10 couples cheated, and the probability of both partners cheating increased by 218.8% compared to 2000.
From a geographical point of view, people in the Northeast and South China have a higher rate of derailment.
It is not only an affair, but the proportion of non-mainstream sexual behaviors such as multiple partners and one-night stands is also higher in these areas. East China, where Shandong, Shanghai, Zhejiang, Fujian and other provinces and cities are located, is relatively conservative, with the lowest proportion of non-mainstream sex.
Is it easier to “steal” with money? According to the survey conducted by Professor Pan Suiming, it is not that “we get worse when we have money”, and non-mainstream sexual behaviors are not strongly correlated with the degree of economic development. 
Among the two regions with the highest proportion of non-mainstream sexual behaviors, South China is relatively rich, while Northeast China is weaker. Compared with whether there is money, the frequency of local social interaction is more convincing. From the perspective of regional differences in non-mainstream sexual behavior, Northeast and South China have more frequent social exchanges. 
An interesting point is that in terms of geographic performance, Northeast China and South China not only “top out” in non-mainstream sexual behaviors, they are also the most abundant in terms of sexual skills. 
After three years, there will be another seven years
When you are in a relationship, you have a strong affection and can’t stand it for a while when you just got married, but if you look at it for a long time, you will get bored. So, how long is this period?
In the TV series “Only Thirty”, Gu Jia and Xu Huanshan were married for ten years, and finally divorced due to Xu Huanshan’s derailment. The plot and reality are not unrelated. There is indeed a “three years of pain in the relationship”. , The seven-year itch”.
In the first three years of a relationship between men and women, the probability of derailment increases over time. After all, just falling in love or getting married, the freshness of each other has not disappeared, and the proportion of having affair is not high.
But after a long time together, life has become ordinary. The trivial matters of firewood, rice, oil and salt make some people feel lonely and start to “steal”. A survey conducted by Tencent’s “Facts” showed that the rate of derailment reached a peak when a relationship lasted one to three years, with the proportion of women derailing rising to 22.2% and that of men rising to 26.8%.
After the “three years of pain”, the ratio of male and female derailment began to decrease, and fell to a low value during the fifth to seventh years of marriage or love.
However, After seven years of love and marriage, the probability of both men and women cheating has rebounded. Compared with men, women have a stronger reaction to experiencing the “seven-year itch”. In all time periods, more than seven years of derailmentThe highest proportion, reaching 28.8%.
This is roughly consistent with Pan Suiming’s survey results. After falling in love or getting married, men cheat faster than women, and women cheat more frequently after a relationship lasts for a long time. 
It was found in the film and television drama that the interrogation and “tearing the little three” after the partner cheated looked very enjoyable, but the reality is not the case. When their partner cheated, a large part of the people pretended not to know and continue to maintain Relationship with each other.
Older people are more willing to maintain marriage. Many people born before the 1970s will choose to “hold their breath” or negotiate peacefully with their partners. The percentage of breakups or divorces is the lowest among all age groups.
When the marriage is long, the cost of divorce will be higher. Compared with direct divorce, they will still choose to make do with it.
Most people born after the 1970s choose to break up or divorce their cheating partners. The proportion of divorcees born in the 90s with cheating partners is 47.1%, the highest among all age groups.
In contrast, post-00 processing is much more “rigorous” for cheating on your partner. 15.2% of post-00s will choose to visit their partner after cheating. Those who exceed 70, 80, and 90 choose The sum of the proportions of “tearing three”.
Unfaithful marriage, cannot escape sex, love, marriage
Extramarital affairs are not a glorious thing, but why do some people prefer to risk being condemned by mainstream morals and still “steal”?
Speaking of it, it is nothing more than these few factors: the intimate life is not harmonious, no love, and more and more unhappy in marriage. 
Not every couple can accept “Platonic” asexual marriages. They are dissatisfied with their intimate lives and have a higher proportion of derailment. Regardless of men and women, people who are very satisfied with their intimate life have a cheating rate of only half of those who are very dissatisfied with their intimate life.
Marriage puts it plainly, that is, to live together in a partnership, the running-in in the marriage is also very important, the satisfaction in the marriage is high, and it is not easy to “change your heart”. The rate of infidelity for men who are dissatisfied with their marriage is 2.3 times that of very satisfied, and the proportion of women is even higher, reaching 3.1 times.
In this case, there may be only one opportunity for derailment. For example, the recent new crown epidemic has put a lot of pressure on everyone. Scholars at the University of Denver in the United States have found that people who are dissatisfied with their current married life are more likely to “find stimuli” during the new crown epidemic. 
Marriage begins with love. Love is no longer there. Marriage maintenance is also very difficult. The better the relationship between the two parties, the less likely it is to derail. However, it seems to be difficult. It is not uncommon to go on a short run in a marriage, and it is quite common to have a mental derailment.
According to a survey conducted by Tencent “Facts”, the proportion of Chinese women who are mentally derailed is 17.7%, which is higher than that of men.
Physical derailment and mental derailment