Always put your expectations on yourself.
Editor’s note: This article is from WeChat public account “Spenser” (ID:spenserandhk) , the author S uncle.
On Saturday, a topic of “China’s single adult population exceeded 200 million” airborne microblogging hot search.
乍一 It’s a bit sad, but the comment area is a sea of joy:
Netizens are not only proud to participate in a 200 million project, but also show off their beautiful single life, from shopping for one person, watching movies for one person, to enjoying a second cup of half-price drink for one person. Wait, all-inclusive.
Although the reasons for singles are different, in my opinion, compared with the evasion of the older generation, it is really a good thing for our generation to be more rational and optimistic about singles.
Why do I think so?
In addition to the benefits of the singles that netizens joked, there is actually one thing that everyone ignores, that is:
If you are single, then you really have to take advantage of the single time;
Because singles are really easier to earn money.
1, Single people can better seize opportunities
The writer Lu Yao has a very real sentence:
In a person’s life, the key is just a few steps, especially when you are young.
From the perspective of return on investment, a person who is in his early twenties to early 30s is the best in his health, the most free time, and the most energetic. It is the best in your life. Assets;
After a while, Ma Yizhen’s divorce news flooded the screen, causing a sudden fire on her interview.
In the interview, in the face of the question raised by the moderator, “Successful women can balance family and work”, Ma Yizhen simply answered “No”.
Because everyone’s time and energy are limited, if you want to go out to film, you must not care about your family; if you want to take care of your family, you will inevitably delay your work.
And this is reflected in our daily work life.
Imagine, if you have an object, you will suddenly have an emergency in the middle of the night, a single colleague can climb up and do it at any time, and your subject suddenly has a stomachache or physical discomfort, have you gone?
Or on the other hand, when you are working again and again, because of work, shelving and dating, shopping, and watching movies, even if the other party is reasonable, do you dare to say that this relationship can be sustained?
The answers are all negative.
Running a relationship requires a lot of time and effort, and grasping a fleeting opportunity also requires a full-fledged attitude. Otherwise, we are likely to miss this step and miss the whole one. Opportunities for development.
After all, being able to control your time and energy completely and freely is your youngest capital.
So single people have very good advantages. They can “all in one place” and work in the workplace, which is more sensitive to opportunities and thus gains an advantage in the start and rise of the business.
2, The longer you are single, the more you can know who you are
What do you find out? In many cases, we use “single body” as a topic and a question to discuss. In essence, our subconscious mind thinks: What age should be done, otherwise it is a kind of “error”.
This step-by-step awareness seems to make our life arrangements clear, but actually leads to a very serious consequence –
We don’t know ourselves at all.
The actor is quiet in a show, the biggest lie in his life, is to say “I love you” to his husband at the wedding.
The quietness of his early 20s, when he filmed the movie “Red River Valley”, he met American actor Paul Kesai and accepted the other’s proposal because he wanted to marry at the “right age”; p>
However, on the day of the wedding, when she faced the priest and said that she would love her husband, she suddenly found that she did not love the man next to her.
Quiet to end this marriage without love, to work, to perform various roles, to reach out to different circles, to understand your heart Real feelings;
Now she is almost 50 years old, and she enjoys this “clear self” state, and her mentality is no different from that of her 20s.
She said a special sentence:
When you are single, pay more attention to yourself and you can make a decision that suits you better.
Sure, cherish the time of singles, don’t worry, feel the world, talk more with yourself;
I have such an example around me, a partner friend, starting from scratch, entering a million years.
He graduated from Sanliu University and learned from the first day of enrollment that his future can only compete with those famous students by better internship experience;
So the whole university for four years, did not play games with the roommates, did not fall in love, focus on the time and energy to focus on oneself, try various interesting work, and then timely resumption, summary, iteration…
He often said: “The biggest achievement of my university in four years is not how much work experience has been accumulated, not how many scholarships I have received, but because I have more than the same age people’s cognition and judgment, so I can be more than people around me. Quickly find the track that suits you.
Selection is more important than effort;
But the premise of choosing is that you know enough who you are.
3, The ultimate meaning of singles, is to teach you to always put your expectations on yourself
Why do I emphasize “self”?
Because the ultimate meaning of enjoying a single person is that it makes you truly realize that for the rest of your life, no matter what happens, we can rely on and rely on it, only ourselves.
Single people can better understand the value of always putting expectations on themselves.
There is a program in “Qi Yu Suo”, which was titled “Where is my partner’s face value distribution, who is 98? Who 2?”, please express your opinion;
Among them, the defender Jiang Sida’s point of view won the full house, he chose to “give himself a value of 98” because:
The beauty of others will always be used to you, but your beauty is not too greasy, and it is difficult to change.
He took his own single eyelids as an example. He said that one day he didn’t sleep well. After he found out, the single eyelids became a small inner pair. He was very happy. He didn’t dare to blink his eyes in a day, and he was afraid that this small double double disappeared suddenly. ;
At night, I was pleasantly surprised to see that my little insider was still there. Although no one noticed this, he had a very happy day.
I particularly recognize this self-pleasing attitude;
Because in my opinion, being able to rely on the outside world to please yourself is to give one person the highest level of self-consistency.
This is not to isolate you from the world, to be self-enclosed, but to keep you humiliating and arrogant, to face the future with all your heart and mind – fame and fortune, gains and losses, victory and defeat, and love.
Like the female writer Xin Yiwu wrote in his own book:
I study hard, study hard, and work hard to make a career. When the person I love appears, whether he is a rich person or nothing, I can open my hands and embrace him.
He is rich, I don’t think it is high climbing;
He is poor, and I am not going to fall.
So, no matter who you are reading this article at the moment, you are alone, or you are accompanied by a lover, I hope that you can maintain this independent and upright soul;
After all, loving yourself is the beginning of a lifetime of romance.