The New Year’s plan is a bit like Einstein’s general theory of relativity-many people know, but few understand

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Editor’s note: As the new year is approaching, we will see that many people are deceiving themselves by saying “new year, new self”, but I believe everyone wants to make progress. In order to help you complete the New Year’s plan, the author provides 5 tips in the article, including setting reminders, planning ahead, rewarding yourself, finding a responsible partner, and letting internal motivation rather than external motivation motivate you to move forward, hoping to implement it for you My New Year’s plan is enlightening. The author of this article Moreno Zugaro, the original title How to Have a Happier New Year by Using the Pareto Principle.

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The new year is about to enter, which means that you have ran around the sun again (fast, applaud yourself), and it’s time to make the next round of New Year’s plans. This time, let us do something that can really make you happier and make your life better.

On the eve of New Year’s Day, most people have fun, drunk and drunk. Firecrackers torment veterans and pets. Occasionally, rockets fly through someone’s window and light the house. This is of course a wild festival, but it is also a good opportunity to reflect and plan for the next 365 days-making the future 365 days better than the past.

However, data shows that the traditional New Year’s plan is not suitable for most people. Only half of people can stick to their goals for more than a month, and more than 80% give up their goals after two years. Only one in five has made lasting changes, and the others always return to their original state soon after.

On January 2nd, you got rid of your hangover, you were super motivated, got up at 6 am and went for a run in the woods (well, maybe not so motivated.) You persisted for a few weeks, but motivation quickly Disappeared. You give up your morning jog, light a cigarette, and start eating junk food and sweets again. Before you know it, you are back to your original state.

Then you berate yourself for not sticking to your goals. You want to know why you can’t even do something as simple as quitting sugar. Why is the attraction of Gummy Bears stronger than your willpower? One year has passed, and 12 months later, you start to look at your wasted year again, regret the goals you missed, and start to feel sorry for yourself. This makes you very unhappy.

I have gone through this cycle so many times that I have decided that if New Year’s plans are made again, they must meet two criteria. First, it must be easy to implement. Second, I must make me happier.

I did this.

Step 1: Reflect on the good, the bad and the ugly

The biggest problem with the New Year’s plan is that people will choose what they think will make their lives better. Exercise three times a week, quit smoking tomorrow, and learn Spanish for one hour a day. But the data shows that this may not bring you lasting change.

If you want to improve your life and become happier, you must start elsewhere—that is, reflect on the past.

A year is a long time. You wake up 365 times a year, do things, and then go to bed. There are too many things to happen. If you don’t take time to reflect, it’s hard to know what makes you happy and what makes you unhappy. It’s like trying to remember all the dishes in your favorite restaurant without a menu-you will remember what you like, but it doesn’t mean that this restaurant only serves pizza and pasta.

If you want to have a happier New Year, the first step is to thoroughly reflect on the past year. Write down what happened—good, bad, and ugly things. I use a diary to review, if you don’t write a diary, don’t worry. You need to do more digging and thinking, but the process is the same, you will find that you have many interesting insights.

What surprised me most in the past year is that my relationship with my girlfriend, family and friends has brought me most of the happiness. If I can spend time with them to enjoy life, then I am happy. If we quarrel, of course we will be unhappy. Although this view is consistent with the results of an 80-year-long Harvard University study on happiness and happiness, I am still confused.

If I were to guess, I would say that my personal achievement is the key driver of happiness. This is the power of reflection.

Step 2: Create the greatest influence with the least input

The Pareto principle tells us that 20% of the effort will bring about 80% of the results. This applies not only to your work, but also to your life. Use this principle well-it will be much easier to improve your life.

If you try to do more interesting things and eliminate boring things, you will soon be exhausted and return to the original mode. Instead, spend your time and energy on the most important things.

List all the things that make you happy and move your life forward-let the good times begin again. Then, write about the things that hold you back—the things you want to avoid next year. Once you have these two tables, find out 80% of the results and 20% of the effort (including the good and the bad). This is the result I want.

The top 20% things that made me happy last year are as follows:

  • Spending time with girlfriend

  • Spend time with good friends

  • My time

  • Busy with my business

  • Make your own decision

  • Personal growth and learning

  • Holidays

  • Reflection

The top 20% things that make me unhappy are as follows:

  • Negative energy

  • Social media

  • Compare yourself with others

  • Work pressure

Once you have finalized these lists, you have reached the crucial final step.

Step 3: Use these 5 helpers to stick to the end

You can have the most real and noble intentions, but if you don’t stick to them, they will be worthless. There is no result without action, and this is always the case.

The difference between persisting and giving up is the difference between happiness and frustration. But why are so many people still fighting for their goals and determination? From a scientific point of view, there are several convincing answers.

In a study, 200 people were asked about their New Year’s plans. Those who give up quickly indulge in self-blame and sentimentalismWish’s idea-hate my failure and hope that the problem can be solved by itself. None of the above knowledge helps when you want to achieve your goals.

Those who stick to their plans will use reminders to reward themselves for correct behavior and hold their friends accountable for their plans. All of these have helped them achieve their long-term goals.

The following are some simple but effective steps I took to ensure that I will stick to it next year.

  • Make a list, write down the top 20% and bottom 20% on a piece of paper and stick it to the door. Every day, I think about what I want and what I don’t want in life, which makes it easier for me to act accordingly.

  • Plan ahead and see what things are in your top 20%. If something is important to you, make time for it. You made the list just for this.

  • Reward yourself and reinforce your behavior through positive feedback. Put $5 in the jar every day without touching social media. If you stick to your goals throughout the week, reward yourself by buying something for the weekend. Build a reward system, which makes it easier to stick to it for a long time.

  • Find a responsible partner. To a large extent, this is an underestimated way to stay on track. You can make your friends responsible for you, control your bad behavior, and remind you to do things that make you happy. If they also have their own plans, you can urge each other.

  • Choose intrinsic motivation over extrinsic motivation. Intrinsic motivation means that you want to do something for yourself, such as a job you love. External motivations kill internal motivations. No matter what your goal is, connect it to your inner desire-don’t exercise to make others feel beautiful, but because you want to stay healthy. The same goal, different motivations, and internal motivation will bring better results.

Summary

The New Year’s plan is a bit like Einstein’s general theory of relativity-many people know it, but few understand it. Setting goals is not just to become stronger, better, and faster. Setting goals is to create a life you like-doing things that make you happy and making progress with like-minded people.

If you have plans for the New Year, make sure they are worth your while. Look back at your past year to find out what made you happy and move your life forward. Then, focus on 20% effort to achieve 80% results. Set reminders, plan ahead, reward yourself, find a responsible partner, and let inner motivation instead of outer motivation inspire yougo ahead.

The secret of happiness is simple. Find out what can and cannot make you happy. Pay more attention to the former and try to eliminate the latter.

I wish you all the best and happy new year!

Translator: Hi Tang