This article is from the WeChat public account: The art of Zen and the universe repair (cosmosrepair) , author: Jade, Photo by Miguel Henriques on Unsplash
Please those who are now reading this text imagine and try to answer a question: On a occasion with a stranger, when you first need to introduce yourself, or A friend I have n’t seen in a while asks what I ’m doing recently, how do you introduce yourself now?
My usual reaction recently is to get stuck.
It’s frustrating to say. This situation has happened many times, and I clearly have enough time to compile a reasonable set of answers. But I was stuck again and again, either on the spot, or pieced together some information that I guess the other party understood easily, or stared at the innocent eyes and said, “I don’t know.”
I started thinking about the true meaning of this question.
First, “What are you doing?” The hint in modern society is, what is your job? But what if a person has several different jobs and they are almost irrelevant? Choose only one of them to say that it is out of context, causing misunderstanding and disrespecting yourself. Speaking out all, in addition to being very tired, I also feel that the other party’s time is wasted. “Nothing to do” This kind of vagueness without information is too casual, and it is always easy to make the scene very rigid.
What if a person has no job but is free? “Unemployed” and “unemployed”, in addition to being a little unpleasant, also imply the meaning of “I just don’t have a stable job temporarily”, as if to be accompanied by a pitiful or ashamed expression. But isn’t that the highest form of survival that the ancient Greeks admired? In the capitalist society after the Industrial Revolution, the social division of labor became more and more clear, so we are used to classifying people into certain occupations or professions. Both church priests and aunts will tell you that hard work is a kind ofvirtue.
Another possibility is that you are doing something with all your heart, but it is difficult to define. If you let a bat introduce itself in 1 minute, it may only say that it is a bird. I have seen many human beings that are clearly classified as “artists” in my opinion, and are reluctant to call themselves artists. Emerging technology industries, art expressionists, and niche freelancers often prefer to honestly describe the nature of what they are doing, rather than classify themselves in a few words.
It’s even more exaggerated if it is a multi-person formal occasion. I find that most people can’t wait to put on their foreheads all the labels that shine most in the secular definition in a short period of time, because in this way they can get effective social interaction.
“I graduated from xxx university, majored in xxx.” “I worked in xxx bank, xxx department, and did xxx.” “I have previously worked as a company xxx, sold it, and now continue to start a business as a xxx.” ” Recently resigned, looking at xxx direction. “
Of course, the information is carefully selected, but the standard is nothing less than:
Phased experience that best represents you
The best way to represent your current social connection
It can make a special impression
Interestingly, through a person’s self-introduction, what you can see is not what kind of person he is, but what kind of person he wants to be.
The more powerful you are, the more you will spare no effort to create yourself. For example, the same entrepreneurial failure, the wording I encountered was different:
“I closed the company and didn’t do it.” “That company is still there, but it won’t make a lot of money, so just put it there.” “I sold the company.” “Failure to start a business , Bankruptcy and liquidation. “…
It’s really hard to admit that you failed. Of the guests I met with podcasts, it was probably only Ryan who frankly acknowledged and described his 3 failures. He not only described himself as “failure”, but also said that “failure was quite tragic” (Evening Wind E15: Jade & Ryan) .
The real curiosity about “introduction” originated from a tech industry gathering. The organizers at the time made the dinner quite private and grand. One of the links was that the “big guys” stood up and introduced themselves.
Looking at them one by one, they picked up wine glasses or flaunted or revealed the labels on their bodies. I suddenly thought: these people are all 30-50 years old, and many people must have their own families and children. Why didn’t anyone stand up and said, “Hello everyone, I’m the father of two children.”
This seemingly insignificant and irrelevant problem is like a nail stuck in my heart, which has been unable to be removed. A few days after I returned, I discussed the issue with several family members or friends. They thought my question was interesting, but couldn’t find the answer.
When did our people become so secular and unitary? Why do we assume that others care the most about our age, education, profession, and marriage without listing? Why don’t we have the courage to face the world in our own way, accepting ourselves without labels first?
Let’s ask the question from another angle. Suppose I am an alien. When I first came to Earth, the first Earth person I met was you. Can you introduce yourself now?
Who are you? What are you doing now? What do you like? are you happy? Who do you love? How are you different from other people on Earth? Have you had any interesting recent discoveries? Is the city you live in okay? Why do you keep holding a screen? …
Perhaps you think that this kind of questioning is too personal and too soul tortured. But since when did we feel it was a shame to reveal our souls in front of others? Is someone not worthy of your frankness, or are you simply unable to face yourself honestly?
So I suddenly realized how precious the “stuck” thing was. It’s the one-second jam, you are introspecting, you are facing your “nothing” sincerely, and the cute embarrassment that comes with it.
When I started to pay attention to my jam, I quickly met more and more “Jam Young”. And at the moment when they were stuck, I could finally repay with an understanding smile.
Lu Yiren: A classical music composition professional, but very good at itOriginal pop music, lead singer, composer, arranger, signed a record company. She also cross-border painting, fashion, writing at the same time, and went abroad to study for a philosophy or art major. She is a bipolar disorder and also feels it will be part of her life. (Evening Wind E22: Jade & Lu Yiren)
Yi Shi: He is a teacher and documentary director of Beiying, but the process of making a documentary is also the process of his self-collapse. The way of reconstruction is the spiritual exploration of traditional Chinese medicine and Buddhism. He wanted to explore “what is real education”, but the ensuing discoveries went far beyond this grand theme. (Evening Wind E21: Jade & Yi Shi)
Summer: She is a travel vlog blogger to outsiders, which is more complicated to me. She is a traveler, photographer, independent documentary creator and producer, a philosopher, and a person who is always on the road, physically and mentally. She resembles Siddhartha in Hesse’s writings, making people a river. The meaning of the river is neither on this bank nor on the other bank, but flowing at this moment. (Evening Wind E18: Jade & Summer)
Mikko: He never said he was an entrepreneur or a currency scientist. He always said he was a reachable duck. I don’t know why Kodak has so profoundly influenced his worldview, but he is one of the best people I have ever met. The truth he believes is lived to every moment of life. In fact, he is one of the few people in China who has a deep understanding of the economics of virtual currency, and although he never mentioned it, he refused to hold Bitcoin. I once asked him if he missed the opportunity to make money in bitcoin, and he said no, “I want to be a person who carries value instead of being shrouded in value.” (Evening wind says E9: Jade & Mikko)
……
Once you know such a person, you will find it really difficult to answer questions such as “Who are you”, “What are you doing” and “Can you simply introduce yourself?” Not only are they difficult to define, they also change from time to time, and once they are interested in something, they will likely become the focus of a certain period of time.
p> This article is from the WeChat public account: Zen and the art of cosmic repair (cosmosrepair) , author: Jade