Snakes, ants, spiders, and centipedes rub mahjong at home. After 8 laps, the smoking was finished. Everyone discusses who to buy cigarettes. The snake said: I have no feet, I will not go, let the ants go. The ant said: The spider has eight feet, more than mine, let the spider go. The spider said: No matter how many feet I have, I can’t beat the centipede, let the centipede go. Centipede helpless, thought to myself: No way, who will let me have more feet? So the centipede went out to buy cigarettes… It was more than an hour, but the centipede did not come back. Two hours later, the centipede did not see the cigarette back. So everyone asked the spider to go out and see the centipede sitting at the door as soon as the spider went out. The spider was very angry and asked: Why are you still not going? Everyone is waiting. Centipede was also anxious and said: nonsense! You have to wait for me to wear shoes! ! !
One day late at night, when a young woman passed a psychiatric hospital, suddenly a wow came from behind. The woman looked around and a naked man was chasing her. The woman was so scared that she ran, and the man behind was hotly chased. No, there is a dead end in front, the woman is desperate, kneeling on the ground and crying and begging: “Do whatever you want, just don’t kill me.” The man smiled slyly and said: “Really? Now you Start chasing me.”
There is a lunatic asylum. One day, the dean wanted to see how many people were ill. Just let the nurse draw a door on the wall. I saw all the patients crashed into the wall like crazy. The dean was disappointed, and suddenly he saw only one patient indifferent. The dean was very happy and ran over and asked him: “Don’t you want to go out with them? The patient replied: “This bunch of silly hats, I have the keys here! “
The spider was very dissatisfied with the bee, so the spider asked his mother: \”Why should I marry the bee?” \”Spider’s mother said:\” The bees are noisy, but they are also flight attendants. \”Bees are also very dissatisfied, so they asked her mother: \”Why should I marry a spider? \”Bee’s mother said:\” Spiders are a little ugly, but they are also engaged in the Internet anyway. \”
After the spider and the bee got married, they were very happy at first. The bee said: ah, it’s good, I can eat meat. The spider said: ah, good, I can taste the honey. If you don’t go out, you’ll know how to get your broken LAN! The spider said: I walked around all day and rubbed all my cosmetics!
I finally reconciled, but: the bees always complained: you are too closed, always in I’m staying in my own net, can I go to the outer net to communicate with the spider outside. The spider sighs: Alas, you don’t know, the company has limited it, it is really impossible to go to the outer net.
American soldiers pick up Reward order to Bush: Catch an Iraqi soldier and get 100,000 US dollars! So Michelle and Yuri began to search near Baghdad. After a few days of fatigue, the two were exhausted and lay on the ground and fell asleep. When Michelle woke up and found that they were surrounded by more than 500 Saddam Republican Guards with guns, he hurriedly awakened Yuri and shouted: “Get up, we are making a fortune! “
The daughter of a farmer is so ugly that he can’t marry,The farmer had to let her go to the cornfield as a scarecrow to scare crows. When she got there, she not only scared away the crows, but even frightened the three crows to return the corn they had stolen.
Little white rabbit and bear blind walked in the forest and accidentally kicked over a pot. An elf came out of the pot and said that they could satisfy each of their three wishes. Xiong blind said, turn it into the strongest bear in the world. Its wish came true. Little White Rabbit said, give him a little helmet. Its desire has also been fulfilled. Xiong blind said, turn it into the most beautiful bear in the world. Its wish was fulfilled again. Little White Rabbit said, give it a bicycle. Its wish was fulfilled again. Xiong Xiazi said, turn all other bears in the world into bitches! The little white rabbit rode on the bicycle and said while running, turning the bear into a homosexual.
A farmer went to a car sales center and saw that he took out RMB 2,000 and shot it on the table: “Bring me a Santana”, the salesperson was shocked: “Your money is not enough”, the farmers are puzzled : “Aren’t the words “Santa 2000″ written outside?” Salesperson: “Oh… Then you go out and turn right, the company’s Mercedes is only 600~~”
The mother said to her daughter: “Today you To practice cooking, get two dishes, I will teach you. Yellow croaker, the straw is burned. The bamboo shoots should be cut fast, every knife, turn around. “The daughter agreed to go. After stopping for a while, my mother went to the kitchen to take a look, but couldn’t help but be shocked. I saw my daughter’s head tied with straw. The body just rotates on the ground, turning around, cutting the bamboo shoots. When she saw her mother, she shouted, “It’s terrible! Dizzy!”
A BMW is parked on the roadside, which is illegal parking. The police came, posted a note, and copied the list. The buddy came out of the mall: “Aren’t you the policeman, cow? What will you post, copy the list!” The policeman glanced at him, didn’t speak, and continued to copy the list. You want a real cow b, don’t stick a note, you just tell the trailer to tow away! The policeman glanced at him, and he hadn’t spoken yet. Besides scaring us, what else do you guys want to scare us! Niu b you drag away! “The police copied the list, called, and called the trailer. The trailer came. The police looked at the buddy. “Hey, you are a real cow!” You are a real cow, you drag away! Borrow you both! The policeman waved his hand and dragged him away. The policeman looked at him and tried to persuade him not to scream like this in the future. The buddy rolled his eyes. Drag his car away! ”