This article is from WeChat official account:Lei Uncle Movie (ID: normalbeauty), author: Uncle Ray film

Yamy’s Weibo essay titled “What the hell am I” has been searched.

As of last night, a few hours after the incident, the person involved Xu Mingchao came out to reply.

However, this is not so much a response as a threat. Xu Mingchao’s enthusiasm has not subsided because of this reply, and even the popular video on Weibo that day is “how to oppose workplace pua”.

Seeing the situation getting worse, Mr. Xu spoke again at noon today. This time, he directly admitted that he was the middle-aged boss of the workplace pua, and then apologized to his celebrities and employees, and explained why he didn’t apologize to Yamy.

As people who eat melons, we certainly cannot know how many deeper entanglements there are between the parties. But so far, what I have seen in Xu Mingchao’s two public replies is that a middle-aged person is self-excusing and irrational. Since he himself admits that he has mental control in the workplace, we will talk about this thing based on the available information.

1

Look at Yamy’s Weibo first. In this Weibo, all you can see is extreme asymmetry in workplace relationships.

Yamy said:

You are the boss, and I am a part-time worker. Maybe I won’t earn one ten thousandth of yours in my life.

Yamy debuted in the draft and is also the captain. He has nearly 6 million followers.It will not be linked to “part-time job”.

But who would have thought that in front of the boss, she was so humble and frankly that she was a part-time worker. I believe that all people who have worked can appreciate the helplessness of how much self-confidence is destroyed in this “part-time job”. And the destruction of this confidence has never been overnight.

In the beginning, the boss’s strategy for her was to slap candy:

For a long period of time, what I have experienced is an endless cycle. Mr. Xu’s attitude towards me always oscillates between the contradictory polarities: You have an advantage and you must have confidence in yourself. You are not worth it, really not worth it. You must be based on works, I absolutely support! You have to make me happy before you mention the needs. ……

This kind of speech is actually not uncommon in the workplace. Many bosses encourage and encourage their employees to work actively. But Xu Mingchao’s encouragement and spur, obviously have already passed the boundary. In this workplace relationship, he plays more than just the role of the boss. Yamy herself said that Xu Mingchao was once the person she trusted the most. Why do you trust your boss?

It’s not difficult to understand. As a newcomer in the entertainment industry, Yamy has formed an orchestra before and participated in talent shows such as “China Has Hip Hop”, but he really gained popularity and made his real debut because of “Creation 101”. On the track of the entertainment industry, she is a novice, and Xu Mingchao is her guide.

Yamy’s special feature is that her rap and her style are relatively niche in the entire entertainment industry. Niche, can be windCharacteristic, but also most afraid of not being accepted. And novices, more or less will tremble in the new environment. At this time, her career guide showed her care and attention, expressing that she was optimistic about her, and trust was easily established.

So next, while encouraging her to give her confidence, while suppressing her is worthless. If you encourage, it will be understood as caring. If suppressed, it will be understood as hating iron but not steel. Yamy really understands this.

The suppression of accusations made me extremely depressed, and a promise made me look forward to.

I used to really think that if there is a problem, it must be my fault, that I did not do well enough.

Thinking about it now, it is fear and low self-esteem that have allowed me to selectively shield the damage that has already existed, and make me live in self-doubt all day long.

She will be depressed and blamed because of the suppression, and she will rekindle hope and expectation because of the promise. At that time, in her eyes, the boss was someone who was optimistic about her and trusted her. She will be afraid of disappointing those who are optimistic about herself, and she is unwilling to disappoint those she trusts. Therefore, if there is a problem with the work, she will not think that the boss is wrong, but immediately reflect on herself.

If this is a short-term behavior, in order to motivate employees to recognize that they are working hard, there is nothing wrong with it. But Yamy came here during the two years he worked for Xu Mingchao. After staying in this mode of getting along for a long time and being suppressed for a long time, slowly and slowly, I don’t feel like myself at all.

I used to not be stubborn, and I was afraid to even mention a basic need;

I used to not hide at home and cry until dawn for no reason;

I used to not see information shaking hands, I want to escape when I hear the voice…

However, employees who are becoming more and more obedient and humble cannot get the boss’s approval. In return, the boss can only increase the pressure. When the workplace relationship is full of pressures and spurs on personal personality, then the workplace relationship becomes a domesticated relationship. The boss will become more and more arrogant, less and less measured, more and more to destroy the self-confidence of employees, to complete his selfish “self-achievement.”

Xu Mingchao is like this.

2

How long does it take to destroy a person’s self-confidence? Yamy’s story tells us that as long as the initial preparation is enough to truly destroy a person’s self-confidence, three to five minutes are enough. This is definitely not Yamy’s weakness or poor endurance.

You can click on Xu Mingchao’s video of insulting Yamy and forcing colleagues to attach yourself, and then you will understand that in the face of real abuse, self-confidence is really vulnerable.


It took Xu Mingchao three steps to destroy Yamy’s confidence.

The first step is to start with the most controversial point of Yamy-looks. Yamy is not a beauty with a tall nose and big eyes in standard aesthetics. She is thin, with small eyes, looks cold and independent when she is not talking, without the sweetness of a young girl.

People who like her say that she is the most recognizable player in 101.

But for people who do not appreciate this temperament, the degree of recognition is controversial. Yamy shouldn’t think of herself as a beauty. She said that her appearance has been controversial since her debut.

But knowing that you are not a standard beauty does not mean you have to accept physical attacks. Netizens’ attacks can still be digested by themselves. After all, it is unwise to be angry with someone you don’t know. But being bluntly ugly by people around you is really hurtful.

Especially, the person who says he is ugly is the person he trusts most. I didn’t finish laughing in private. Still speaking very seriously in front of many people in public. Not only did I say it, but everyone agreed.

This is no longer a boss’ suppression of subordinates, not a spur, but a personality humiliation. However, this extremely excessive thing was only the beginning of humiliation. After humiliating Yamy’s appearance, Xu Mingchao immediately began to attack Yamy’s sense of fashion.

Fashion has always been one of the distinctive style labels on Yamy. Since the “Creation 101” period, many netizens have said that Yamy is a supermodel face.

After debuting, Yamy is indeed the most outstanding member of the group in fashion resources and fashion expression. Among the representative works of Baidu Baike Yamy, the first column is the fashion week she was invited to participate in.

The other members of the group are not focused here. (The facts stated here are not intended to be trampled, please also fans to treat it rationally)